717#4 the nots

Today, I started my week with my non-work day, as I started working from Tuesdays to Fridays this week. To my surprise, after resting over the weekend, I had abundant of energy to do a bit of reading on administrative law in the morning. By a bit, I meant two hours.

 I then took a significant break, where I made my quick-y lunch - store-bought potato salad with champagne sausages and rockets and spinach leaves. Upon finishing lunch, sis called, and we chatted for about an hour while I drank a green tea and ironed clothes.

 In the afternoon, I did another hour of learning about AI on Git Hub.

Finally, I ended the day/evening by inviting myself to dinner with myself. I took that tram from right outside of my building into the city. I didnt know where I was heading, which is very rare for me, and I am almost always a person who plans. But with just myself to take care of, I just walked around until I saw something I never ate before. It was a Korean eatery with sop bap - I think it means crusty-rice-made-into-porridge. I thought of Yuna, my former colleague who told me Korean's side dishes are free-flow. I would have not known about that fact otherwise.

I am now listening to Hospital Playlist music, still, years and years after watching the series. I am still very much a fan, maybe even more of a fan of cho jung seok. I realised, I like this actor because he is genuinely kind, thoughtful, and sweet. It isnt just his character in the series but in real life too.

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Having that walk in the city, I realised, every mum or dad could have taken care of their kids by themselves while allowing the other partner to just go out and do whatever they want. I wish parents out there know, they really do deserve some time outside of the musts and needs, just some time for whatever they want.

Could it be everyone else already know this but me?

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While I was out by myself, I listened to the Book Summaries podcast episodes on IFS/No Bad Parts as well as Bird by Bird - I somehow hear the single element that connects healing thyself and writing, that is just accepting and being with the real you - no matter how uncomfortable it is.

Inside me, I somehow sometimes imagine that I could go back into my past relationship because I am now better. But the next second, I would tell myself, I am better now precisely because I am out, I am no longer there. Thus, it is really important to love myself, hold myself, care for myself, and just be kind, thoughtful, and sweet like how cho jung seok to others, but towards myself.

I hope through writing, it am able to connect with myself and others better, meaning better legal work, and better podcasting, and making the world better in the tiniest way - that is making my life and of peoples around me a teeny weeny bit better.

That podcast says, the first draft is for my own eyes. But I am not publishing. So publishing the first draft on my blog sounds good enough for me.

I wish to come back regularly to type - write soon.

A good Monday it is. 

4/8/2025 

717 #3 Start again - Nyad

Nyad became the first person swimming from Cuba to Florida at the age of 64 (177.028km/110 miles). She was the first person to cross that straits when no one knows whether it was humanly possible.

The Oscar nominated movie based on the real story of Nyad captured the journey of a retireestrives to live her life fully and braves through failures. Watching this movie at the age of 37, at the junction of finishing a law degree and becoming a lawyer, I wonder what I take away from the movie and/or the legendary heroic swim from Cuba to Florida.

"One Good Stroke"

After the team (the captain, the navigator, the skipper, medics) finally saw the light emitted from the coast of Florida, there was a moment when Nyad did not seem to move forward. She floated for awhile. Her coach Bonnie jumped into the water with her, and told her to give her "one good stroke". When Nyad did so, Bonnie said another "one good stroke".

When the task seems monumentous and unachievable, one more minute, another more minute, may be what we can do. 

This aligns with the 原子習慣 Atomic Habits that when you break the task down to the smallest component. It becomes easier to DO. 

I intend to try this in my current challenge to complete Practical Legal Training tasks. One good minute. Where will you try this mantra?

Crew Up

When Nyad finally reached the shore of Florida, she said three things. I can only remember two now. First, never, ever give up. Third, it looks like a solitary sport but it takes a team.

In my journey of becoming a law student and a lawyer, I become clearly aware that lawyering is team work.

When I am a law student, my team comprises of my daughter Lala who is my cheerleader. She keeps telling me, you need to study so you can become a lawyer, right, mama? She tells that to random strangers too. Ya, I need to study, so I will become a lawyer.

Later on, I found my people, a tiny few friends from the course and even less lecturers who see my potential before I do.

I have only met people who generously encourages and appreciates what I have done. In my journey of becoming a lawyer, I am lucky enough to find and keep the people who will crew me up to reach my shore of Florida.

Who are in your team?

Never, ever give up

Nyad had four attempts before the legendary swim.

The thing about never give up in meditation world would sound like "let go. start again".

Seven years ago, when Lala came into my life, my perfectionist-self found that I no longer have a self and control over life. And I could not do the most important task of my life well - caring for Lala. Then, I found meditation.

Meditating has been a journey, like writing. Start. Drop. Long pause. And, start again.

The key to move forward and onward, I think is to let go of what others see as a failure. It was one and it was not. It is another step forward, another stroke forward, bringing human kinds closer to the impossible, bringing myself closer to the yet-achievable.

With this post, I did one good stroke to start again. See you next.

717 #2 police 警察

 

Growing up in Malaysia, one does not often hear good things about the police. I personally, had not heard anyone praise the police they have engaged with yet. And it is fair to say we each can tell you a fair few 'stories' of our own or someone we know/love/trust had bad experience with the police.

My littlest son Lu went back to Malaysia and was just being his usual self. He loves police. He says Hello to every police he sees. He was literally looking forward to checkpoints, as I explained that there would be the police from this country, and then the police from that country, then there you would be in your destination country!

One day, outside of KLCC/Petronas Twin Tower, he said Hi! enthusiastically to the police officers at the entrance. I think they were directing the cars in front of a commercial building entrance. I cannot explain why do they do security guards' job, but they do.

One of them gave Lu a Hi. Immediately after, they treated him as if non-existing. To Malaysians, this is not uncommon. Not a lot of Malaysian kids say Hello to police officers to begin with. Friendly police officers in the heat and humid afternoon?? What am I dreaming?

Anyway, Lu comforted himself in some way. He must have said something to me and himself to the meaning of "I said Hello to them, I have good manner." And I replied, yes you are so friendly, Lu.

I did not think much about the common, usual, unimpressed police officers.

-- Singaporean police (show)

Days later, I was with my parents in my childhood home. We Johorians, at least my family anyway, often have the Singaporean free-to-air tv channel on. For some weird reasons, Mandarin and English channels were both showing crime/police/investigation-related series. Then, I had an a-ha moment (sudden insight). Malaysian police have not been making any propaganda/publicity or fictional feel-good show! Even if they were famously not efficient, they didn't even bother to try to pretend they were not on tv!

You know, Singaporean tv makes you feel safe! The police are so efficient, earnest, detailed, technologically advanced, resourceful ... you name it!

-- Melbourne neighbourhood police station

I have such privilege today to walk my son to and fro school (child-care). And I am reminded that we actually pass by the police station every school day. Our neighbourhood station is diagonally opposite his school. The most exciting thing to see on his way to school is the police station! We walked today and we were at the back door of the police station. We were lucky and the gate was open. And they were cleaners cleaning the police cars/vans... Lu shouted Hello!! from across the street. The cleaners didn't hear, with the noise of shushing water and vacuum machine. I had to explain to Lu they could not hear you. Lu said, when I finish school, they can hear me

There we have the police in the three countries/places for Lu-the-police-admirer for now.