717 #1 To write or not to write, is A Okay

It's a new day and it's La's birthday. 

I thought 7 years ago, La upgraded me to be a mum. And, today, she can push me to upgrade myself to be a writer. 

*** 

We just came back from a holiday, visiting families overseas. Once we are back, it is flipping to the next chapter. I instruct La to start something new - to do one page of exercise everyday. It has only been two days. And she has done just that. 

At the same time, I should be researching for my honour thesis but I haven't started. And I should also start some interest-project, be it piano-playing or writng and yet I haven't. 

So, I thought I need to start 717. So La can one day see that, mama is not perfect either. She is lazy sometimes and yet mama is also 'perfectly imperfect'. 

I hope with 717, I write something, anything, everyday. And, maybe, one day, we can both be published. If not, at least La knows I try, I fail, and that's okay. 

Happy 7th Birthday, La. Let mama use myself as a present for you. 

Also, in case you forget in the future, Joy bought you superb gifts yesterday (Magic Mixie & something fairy/princess/rabbit?!?) And today, after picking you up from school, you will go choose a costume and some cakes! Happy birthday, gal!

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Meanwhile, the finance minister, Mathias Cormann, is talking in Canberra running through the fiscal supports the Australian government has put in place, and foreshadowing – with very little detail – a five-year economic plan to pull the country out of the recession.

We are doing all of this against the backdrop of an economic and fiscal outlook that remains highly uncertain ... but we are in a better, stronger, more financially resilient position than just about any country in the world.

Cormann said the detail of the five-year plan will be unveiled in the federal budget in October, which will also have the full four years of forward estimates. They are only dealing with two years today, 2019-20 and 2020-21.

Updated at 11.21am AEST
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46m ago 11:18

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50m ago 11:14
NSW has recorded 19 new coronavirus cases

NSW recorded 19 new cases of coronavirus in the 24 hours to 8pm yesterday.

The 19 new cases are:

Three people associated with the Crossroads Hotel cluster
Nine people associated with the Thai Rock restaurant cluster
Three cases still under investigation
One south-western Sydney resident who acquired their infection in Victoria and has been self-isolating since arriving in NSW
Three returned travellers in hotel quarantine.

Updated at 11.17am AEST
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52m ago 11:12

Frydenberg said Australia was still performing stronger than other comparable nations.

Despite our increased debt levels they remain lower than many comparable nations will exit this crisis with.

He said that globally the average debt ratio is expected to exceed 100% by the end of 2020.

Updated at 11.13am AEST
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53m ago 11:11
Katharine Murphy

Katharine Murphy

Here are the key numbers:

Two deficits, $85.8bn in 2019-20 and $184.5bn in 2020-20.
Net debt $488.2bn at 30 June 2020 and $677.1bn the following year.
Tax receipts are down $31.7bn in 2019-20 and $63.9bn in 2020-21.
Growth will fall by 3.75% this year and GDP is forecast to be 2.5% higher next year.
Unemployment to peak at 9.25% in the December quarter.

Updated at 11.20am AEST
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55m ago 11:09

Frydenberg said the coronavirus has had “a significant impact on the budget bottom line”.

He said the Australian government has introduced fiscal support measures worth $164bn, or 8.4% of GDP.

99% of that spending is over the financial years 2019-20 and 2020-21.

Our measures have been temporary, they have been targeted, and they have helped to maintain the structural integrity of the budget.

Updated at 11.20am AEST
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1h ago 11:07
GDP to fall by 3.75% in 2020

Frydenberg says the coronavirus crisis means Australia’s GDP will fall 3.75% in 2020, but grow by just over 2% in calendar year 2020.

In the financial year 2019-20, he says, the real GDP will fall by 0.25%, and in 2020-21 it will be 2.5% down.

Frydenberg:

The coronavirus crisis has led to unprecedented economic support to the tune of around $11tn. Here in Australia the Morrison government has deployed $289bn ... the equivalent of 14.6% of GDP.

Our economic strength going into this crisis has given us the financial firepower to respond.

He said a significant decline in tax receipts and a large increase in government payments had led to a “dramatic change in the budget position”.

These harsh numbers reflect the harsh reality we face.

Updated at 11.13am AEST
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1h ago 11:05
Victoria has recorded five new deaths from coronavirus, and 403 new cases

Victorian premier Daniel Andrews says Victoria has recorded 403 new cases overnight, and five new deaths.

Four of the people who died were in aged care.
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1h ago 11:00

The treasurer, Josh Frydenberg, has begun giving the economic update.

We’re also expecting Daniel Andrews to step up soon. I’ll cut to that with the numbers when we get them.

I hope it's gonna be a better day.

Stay positive
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Daddy Lua

Leila

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写在你三岁以前

写在你三岁以前

再过一个月又五天，你又过生日了。不过，到时候，弟弟到来了，我大概睡眠不足不能为你写下什么，所以趁现在好好记录一下你在三岁以前的样子。以后，忘记了，再读到会很窝心吧。

今天早餐以后，爸爸拿出同事Joy姨姨给你做的饼干，爸爸问你：你要one or two?
你伸出三个手指说：“three,one for mama, one for baba, one for leila. one, two, three.”
你是一个如此懂得分享的孩子。

后来，我带你去playgroup，别人家都是妈妈带去的，你平时由爸爸带你去。你特别爱去，就在那里自由地玩耍free play就很开心。你邀请我去跟你一起野餐，妈妈这，妈妈那，你一定在等我陪你去playgroup很久了吧。你在活动结束前总是有水果吃，今天hadiah没有准备，你跟我说:"I want fruits" 我说，你去跟hadiah说，你就跑去跟hadiah说，毫不胆怯，hadiah真的去弄了点葡萄来给你吃。我心想，你真棒。想什么，要什么，就说出来，就争取到了。

今天下雨，你穿雨靴，出门和回家的路上，你在水滩跳几下就很开心。像你这样真好。

回到家，也许是我饿了，又或是累了，开始觉得你一分钟就叫几次“妈妈，妈妈”我快不行了。吃饱午餐，也是我去看诊的时候，我真的就离开你出门去透透气了。不是你不好，完全不是，只是你需要的或许我给不了，或许没有一个成人给得了，需要至少两个成人去承担吧。所以，我在门口给你抱抱告别，跟你说，你伤心的话，爸爸可以给你抱抱，妈妈去医院了。于是，你就转身跑去爸爸那边找安慰了。

我离开，上电车，听听mindfulness的音频，为了清空一下脑袋。真的感觉好一点。其实，离开好像是为了回归一样。

回到家，爸爸在打游戏，我带着你去阳台，我晒衣服，你在那里play play。你在户外透透风，就很开心。我跟你说，我们在阳台静静的不聊天回去再聊，你也很明白，自己坐下自言自语。过后，你问我:"mama, can i talk to you?"当时，我真的又再ready了，我们就那么平和地继续了今天下半天的连结。

你喜欢baby，你喜欢你的弟弟，你会抱他亲他跟他说话。我也和你一起看其他baby的视频，baby yuuji, baby rayna，你都很喜欢，问我他在干嘛？

说到喜欢。你喜欢黄色，和黑色，因为那是Emma的颜色。
你的逻辑思考，你的方位辨认，你的视觉辨认都很神奇。去过的地方，跟谁去的，你都记得。真的记得。怎么记得的，我完全不明白。
你还是对画啦，彩啦没有太大的兴趣。
不过，你可以自己想象故事，然后要爸爸妈妈配合你说这句话，或者跌倒或者哀伤或者。反正，你可以自编自导自演。
你从小到大，都不爱睡觉。现在简直到了决定不睡觉的年纪，所以爸妈也放弃让你去睡你不想但是需要的午觉了。你能睡不阻止，你不睡就随你吧。
你从小到大，醒来都要哭。到今天，也还是不改变。就像到今天你睡觉，脸颊被枕头挤到，还是很圆，跟小时候一模一样，特别特别可爱。有些东西，尤其是关于睡觉的事，从开始到现在不改变。爸妈真没哪里做错，你就是这个样子。要三岁了，还是坚持这样。

你特别特别有爱。你会问起你爱的人（爸妈的朋友）。
“Ali叔叔在哪里？”
“我想念婆婆爷爷Ali，雁鸿，仪婉”
"Lucien, I love you."
"Love baba, mama."
"Mama, I love you."尤其在我做了让你很开心的事的时候。

你喜欢被爸爸抱得高高的，高过他的头。你喜欢被爸爸倒挂。你不喜欢被爸爸狂吻，但是你会忍不住大笑。你冲凉喜欢爸爸，泡澡喜欢跟妈妈一起。一听到“睡觉”，马上变形说：“我要爸爸陪five minutes”。起床以后，一定先找妈妈，找到妈妈的话，完全不要爸爸，跟睡觉前完全是两个人。你的奇异个性，我们好爱。

最后，说一件四天前，妈妈跟你单独约会发生的事。我们吃完了蛋糕，要去找果汁。你经过The Block Archade门口，跟我说：“妈妈，我要进去看看可以吗？”当然可以，我们就拐个弯进去了。
你指着建筑顶端的装饰问我：“叔叔有什么？”那是建筑的装饰，是个拿着我也不知道叫什么的乐器的雕像。我说是乐器。你问我：“为什么没有music?"我心想，确实，有乐器应该有音乐呀。我说：“是hor，为什么没有音乐呢？That's a good idea."我们继续在Archade逗留了一阵子，突然音乐响起了。原来，整点时刻，会有音乐，雕像会动起来。你看见了非常入神，非常开心。音乐停下，你还鼓掌了。过后，你告诉我你有听过，是Yiwan带你来的。我觉得你似懂非懂的这样带我发现我不知道的墨尔本真是太好玩了。

妈妈爸爸是外来人，可是你是本地人。你的成长注定跟这个地方无法分割，也跟爸爸妈妈来自的文化地方语言无法分割。我非常期待你的成长，我随着成长，也看你如何去勇敢地却又充满爱地过着你的日子得到你想要的。生日快乐，亲爱的。三岁的你，真棒。